Community Blog: Joan Lloyd

If his cynical view of the world were an anomaly, I’d write it off as a sign of the times. The problem is, I’m hearing versions of his comments everywhere I go these days. People are willing to sacrifice but there is a limit to how long they can make that stretch.

Some recent surveys point to a larger trend. For example, Watson Wyatt found employee engagement to be down 9%. But among high performing professionals, that disengagement dropped to 25%. It doesn’t bode well for companies hoping to hold on to their top talent when the veil lifts.

According to surveys released a few weeks ago, by Monster and Human Capital Institute, cynicism is on the rise:

Do you think managers are accountable to their direct report associates as to where they are on a day-to-day basis?

Answer:

It sounds as if your manager goes AWOL and you’re not happy about it. The answer to your question depends, in part, on:

• How much the manager’s employees need him/her for guidance, questions and decisions.
• What is going on in the unit, or in the company.

If your manager is absent for days at a time, and no one knows where he or she is, that could be an issue. Part of a manager’s job is to provide direction, help and coordination to his unit. If employees have no idea where he is, and worse, he isn’t available to them via mobile phone, that is a problem.

Not only is it a problem for his direct reports, who are left hanging, it is bad for morale. Employee groups, who have an absentee boss, tend to resent the absence and grow bitter. I often see negative employees become vocal about a missing manager and begin to take matters into their own hands. In the worst cases, they can bully and intimidate others who don’t join the ranks of the negative, disenfranchised informal leader.

Senior management won’t be happy, either. If his boss can’t get in touch with him, it doesn’t look good. If it happens twice, it won’t be pretty.

With that said, I want to make a point about the role of the manager and why he or she may be away from the unit on a regular basis. One of the most significant changes that occurs when you are promoted to a manager role is how you use your time and your schedule. The focus shifts from downward on the work at hand, to a 360-degree view of not only their department, but other departments, and upward to senior management and outside to the customer. Suddenly, it seems their day is filled with meetings. It can be a big challenge—at least at first-- for a new manager, because it seems his calendar is no longer under his own control and his work is harder to measure.

At the very least, however, I believe a manager owes it to his primary constituents.—his own employees—to let them know where he is. If the manager is smart, he or she will also let the team know what he or she is doing. If the manager doesn’t let them know, it breeds suspicion about what the manager is up to…and it’s usually no good.

If the manager must be away for periods of time, it becomes more crucial to meet with the team on a regular basis, and hold one-on-one meetings with each direct report, to provide the kind of face time that is needed. If this doesn’t happen, the manager isn’t adding any value to the group. If these meetings are frequently canceled it will also breed contempt, because employees will feel disrespected, in addition to feeling abandoned.

In many companies, where managers are separated geographically from their employees, this can be accomplished by phone meetings, or video conferencing. However, there is no substitute for good old fashioned face-to-face contact. There is no better way to build trust, motivation and engagement. 

Joan Lloyd is an executive coach, management consultant, facilitator and professional trainer.  Email your question to Joan at info@joanlloyd.com.  Visit www.JoanLloyd.com to search an archive of more than 1300 of Joan’s articles.  (800) 348-1944 © Joan Lloyd & Associates, Inc.

Would you like to bridge the commitment gap with your employees?   We provide management consulting, executive coaching and customized, skills-based training for managers and supervisors, that changes behavior, creates a healthy culture and builds a customer-focused team.  Call us today at (800) 348-1944.

Does your team need a tune-up? We will conduct a detailed assessment and get to the bottom of the problem.  We will provide you with detailed recommendations and work with you, and your team, to implement needed changes.  We work with all levels within your organization, team or department.  We have an excellent track record of success with teams in a variety of industries.  Call us today for information at (800) 348-1944.

Good managers know that employee satisfaction is essential to healthy teamwork, initiative and productivity.  Joan Lloyd’s booklet, 86 Creative Ideas for Having More Fun & Less Stress at Work, is packed with ideas for building employee satisfaction and work/life balance while reducing stress in your workplace.  Guaranteed to give you fresh ideas any company can implement in categories such as: Fun with a Purpose, Building a Family Atmosphere & a Sense of Community, Having Fun at Work for the Sake of Fun, Rewarding Great Performance & Stress Busters!  Also available by return email, in PDF format!

I currently work as a coordinator in my present company and am looking to advance my career.  There are possibilities to advance to a larger department where I would be considered a Director.  I would still be in charge of my current department which would then be assumed by the new position, as well as title change. 

However, I recently found out, through the current director, that I am not being considered for the position.  I know that I am qualified.  I also know that the employee they are considering is not respected in our organization.   However, I would like to know the best way to make it known to my supervisor that I would like to be considered for the job, if it were available.  What is the best way to handle this without any mud slinging or unprofessional behavior?  What would be the most persuasive argument that I could make that could enlighten my supervisors? 

Answer:

When you start slinging mud, it usually ends up splattering you, too. You are wise to be looking for an above board approach for several reasons. Not only would badmouthing this candidate make your motive suspect; you would have to face working with her, if you don’t get the job. You might also poison your chances for a future promotion, if your actions were viewed as politically underhanded.

I can’t discern if the person they are considering is outside the company or outside your own area. If the candidate is from inside the company, there is a good chance they will find out about his or her reputation from your boss or others. If the person is from outside the company, that information may not be discovered.

I recommend that you tell your own supervisor that you are interested in applying for the position and ask for some advice about the best way to go about applying. If the job isn’t posted, ask your manager if he or she would be willing to support your candidacy to the hiring director in the other area.

If your boss tells you that you wouldn’t be considered for the position, ask, “Can you give me some feedback that will help me understand why I wouldn’t be considered? If I know, it would help me get ready for the next opportunity.” Manage your disappointment and listen carefully to the answer. If you still feel strongly that you should be considered, say, “I’d still like to be considered. If nothing else, going through the interview process would be valuable for me, and may position me for other opportunities in the future.”

If you aren’t going to be considered for the job and it looks like the other person is a finalist, you may be in a position to give your manager a heads up that could be passed along to the hiring manager. You could go to your manager and say, “We all have a vested interest in Sue making the right decision on who to hire for the new director position. I hope she does a good job checking references in (name the departments) before making an offer to Pat. There are some issues she may not be aware of.” If your manager is smart, the message will be delivered…without any mud at all.

Joan Lloyd is an executive coach, management consultant, facilitator and professional trainer.  Email your question to Joan at info@joanlloyd.com.  Visit www.JoanLloyd.com to search an archive of more than 1300 of Joan’s articles.  (800) 348-1944 © Joan Lloyd & Associates, Inc.

Do you need answers to tough job hunting questions?  Are you looking for some added punch to help you stand out from the crowd?  Joan Lloyd’s has developed job hunting tools that can help you to maximize your job search:

Savvy Negotiation Strategies to Get Paid What You’re Worth on a New Job (Detailed, 8-page PDF by email – no shipping charge)
Easy, Step-by-step Guide to Using the Internet to Land a Great Job (10-page PDF by email – no shipping charge)
The Resume That Opens the Door and the Interview That Gets the Job (37-page PDF by email – no shipping charge)

Your career is your responsibility.  Create your own job security by acting more like an entrepreneur at work. Learn how to “sell” your skills to your organization, add more value on the job, develop your internal advocates and identify your personal motivators with Joan Lloyd’s You, Inc. – Success Strategies to Boost Your Career & Help Your Organization. Take charge of your career, today! 

I have a difficult situation with work which is also impacting my marriage. I worked for 8 years in Information Systems for a large, well known company which is on the East Coast (I live in the Midwest).  My husband works for the same company. The new company really didn’t have a role that matched my skill set but they wanted to keep me so they wrote a position for me. Within a few months I saw a need within the company that I could fill with my skill set, so I did.

Over the years I created repeatable processes which eventually turned into a new formal job description, that was filled with other workers across several departments.  The down side is this job is tedious, meticulous work for half of the time and very high stress and high visibility for the other half.  I grew bored and frustrated and stressed out with it about 3 years into it, which I told my boss.  For the purpose of this letter I’ll call her “Mary.”  To get me to stay in her department in this job, Mary allowed me to train in areas I was interested in, and work on side projects when I had down time.

While this company paid me very well and allowed me to work from home, they also expected me to be available to work 24/7/365 days a year, working with teams literally scattered from the West Coast to the East Coast as well as India. This made working at all hours of the day or night a necessity due to the time zones.  Because of my particular job I worked every Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years Eve the entire time I worked there as this is one of the busiest seasons for the company.   A year and a half ago, I finally had enough and my husband and I decided that I should give notice and leave. 

I left on very good terms and I’ve had calls every few months from various managers I’ve worked for (there’s a lot of re-orgs that go on there so I’ve worked for quite a few people) with different offers to return in various roles and capacities.  I’ve always said no, until two weeks ago.

Mary contacted me and asked if I could return to my old job and help out with year-end work.  In this initial conversation with her, I made it very clear I was available only during normal working hours (8-5) during the weekdays, and only for a standard 40 hour week, through the end of the year. I told her the amount of work she wants me to handle is double the amount I had ever done on my own previously and I would need help. She readily agreed these conditions would be fine.   My husband and I talked it over, didn’t see a down side, so after negotiating my fee and confirming with her again on my hours, and that I would need help, I agreed and signed contracts with the consulting agency.  

This week I was supposed to have a PC delivered so I could start work but it was delayed, so my start date has been delayed.  Not wanting to lose time, Mary told me she would set up a conference call with the teams I would be working with (all folks I’ve worked with many times before over the years).  I received the email invitation for the half hour meeting and I noticed Mary was not on the invite list.  I asked Mary if she was overlooked and she indicated the call was scheduled at a time she had another meeting so she could not attend but we would “touch base” after.  The Director who is running this meeting is Mary’s direct report; I’ll call him “Don”.

During this call Don and team members started by asking if I would schedule some of my working hours to be after 5 because their calendars were too full to meet with me during the day. They asked if I could take on yet another project beyond that Mary mentioned to me, and Don talked of extending the contract beyond the date I agreed to. (He may have thought this was incentive for me to work evening hours. It isn’t. I will not extend my contract).  I held firm on the call that due to previous commitments I would not be able to work beyond 8 – 5, which I had agreed upon with Mary.  I said I would work on whatever projects they needed, but I already had more than I could do so I would need the projects prioritized so someone else could pick up the ones that I didn’t get to.  There were a lot of “pregnant pauses” on the call and Don and team members just told me they would “work with it”.  No further discussion as to how they would “work with it” or when they would even reconvene to discuss the issues occurred.

Joan, I’ve worked with these folks for years, and I know they will expect me to take long meetings when I get home from my evening obligations, regardless of what time it is.  I could give Mary the benefit of the doubt that she hadn’t communicated what I told her about my hours with Don, but I really don’t believe it.  I think she purposely didn’t attend the call and asked them to push me on the hours to see what I would do. Mary, and the company in general, often says one thing to their employees, and deliver something entirely different. This has happened to my husband, as well as others I knew within the company.

After the call, I summarized what was asked of me and my responses, including the hours and extra project, into meeting minutes and sent them to Mary telling her to call whenever she wanted to “touch base.”  That was Thursday morning.  I’m still waiting.  I think it’s going to be a long wait.

Joan, I know I am so fortunate in these times that I don’t need this job or the money.  I mainly accepted it because I thought it would be good to stay current in my field (I haven’t worked since I left the company and I want to stay marketable).  The money is good for a 40 hour week.  It’s not nearly enough for working nights and weekends. 

I am going on vacation this week and I will be starting the job in November.  I am planning to talk to Mary on my first day, to let her know that I was disappointed that what we had agreed upon hadn’t been shared with the team prior to our meeting.  I want to make it clear, in a nice way, that I will not work the hours I have in the past no matter how much pressure is exerted and the team needs to make other arrangements to get additional help and coverage in terms of evening/weekend hours.  I also want to tell her that if the team feels they need more flexibility for hours and the projects are risk due to my schedule, I will certainly understand if she’d prefer to spend her funding on a consultant who can accommodate that. (This is unlikely as it would take over 2 months to train someone to do the job).  However, my husband feels very strongly that I’ve already told her and the team my constraints and I should leave it alone now and let them work it out.  As he works for the company, and occasionally with Mary, who is very close to being an Executive level manager, he has a vested interest in how I handle this.  We are very much at odds at what needs to be done.

Answer:

I agree with your husband. You’ve stated your terms to Mary, and to the team. There is no need to repeat yourself a third time.

I would caution you against assuming Mary’s absence from the meeting was intentional. I wouldn’t recommend jumping to the conclusion that they were directed to pressure you for more hours. It may have been a simple lack of communication.

Instead, on your first day, express your appreciation for the opportunity, and thank her again for her willingness to let you work 8-5. If, over the first few weeks, it becomes clear that 8-5 isn’t going to work, approach Mary and calmly suggest that as much as you enjoy working with the team, she should find another consultant who can fulfill the demands of the job.

Joan Lloyd is an executive coach, management consultant, facilitator and professional trainer.  Email your question to Joan at info@joanlloyd.com.  Visit www.JoanLloyd.com to search an archive of more than 1300 of Joan’s articles.  (800) 348-1944 © Joan Lloyd & Associates, Inc.

Your career is your responsibility.  Create your own job security by acting more like an entrepreneur at work. Learn how to “sell” your skills to your organization, add more value on the job, develop your internal advocates and identify your personal motivators with Joan Lloyd’s You, Inc. – Success Strategies to Boost Your Career & Help Your Organization. Take charge of your career, today! 

Good managers know that employee satisfaction is essential to healthy teamwork, initiative and productivity.  Based on an in-depth study of the most innovative ideas in creating a culture where employees thrive, our recruiting & retention tools have all the secrets you will need to find and keep the best employees. Creative Recruiting & Retention Strategies
or Recruiting & Retention Booklet Series (Includes Joan’s booklet, 86 Creative Ideas for Having More Fun & Less Stress at Work) 

I was hired on as an HR Generalist at an Engineering company and relocated 3 1/2 hours away from my hometown.  I have a degree in Psychology with a focus in HR, but my education never prepared me for the situation I have encountered in my new position.  I have a moral conflict and need some advice. 

The CEO of the company is verbally abusing his wife/assistant in front of all the staff.  He humiliates her by screaming at her, throwing things at her, and continually telling her she has no worth.  It is the saddest situation I have ever seen.  I spoke with him privately and told him that his behavior made not only myself, but other employees, feel very uncomfortable.  I had only been working there for two weeks at this point.

My empathetic listening skills kicked in when the wife approached me seeking "friendly" advice about her abusive husband.  As a psychology professional, I would have had her pack her bags and check into a womens' shelter.  His temper is frightening, and his violence was unacceptable.  As an HR professional, I identified the work problem as they cannot work together and that a no nepotism policy should take effect.  I encouraged and helped her find a new job.  She received an offer from a previous employer yesterday and she desperately wanted to go back. 

I went to work this morning and her face was swollen, eyes red, and tears plenty.  She had approached her husband, the CEO, about the new job opportunity.  He set up new rules for her as punishment.  She is not allowed to do anything unless it involves work or taking care of their kids.  She is not allowed to leave the office, or her house.  She is told what to do, and when she can do it.  The new job was shut down! 

I have an ethical problem here.  As an HR employee, I do not want this type of verbal abuse in the workplace.  I also do not want to become a marriage counselor!  I love my job, need my job, and don't want to move again!  Do you have any advice?         

Answer:

Your situation proves that abusers come from all walks of life. He sounds dangerous. He knows his abuse is visible to others, yet he has continued to increase its intensity. Bravo for having the spine to confront him after only two weeks on the job, however, it hasn’t been enough to contain his behavior. Approaching the problem as a nepotism issue is a good move, too, but I doubt you will get him to put that policy in place.

Sadly, she sounds so beaten down, she has lost the self esteem required to walk out on him. If there are children involved, perhaps she could be encouraged to leave for their sake. She needs counseling, support and protection—and she needs to get it from an outside source. You’re right about assuming the role of marriage counselor—it’s not appropriate and it’s not safe.

I spoke with Jill Zoromski, Senior Vice President, Retail Banking, at Associated Banc-Corp, to get her perspective. She said, “The writer doesn’t want to be a marriage counselor, but there is a certain responsibility we all need to take regarding fellow human beings.  This is the same logic that applies to seeing someone being mugged, or beaten.  Your responsibility as a bystander is to seek help.  In this case, I think that the wife should be advised to move out and go to a women’s shelter for further assistance. “

I agree. In addition, it would be a smart move to contact your outside corporate counsel to assess the risk to the organization and to you. Here are some questions to ask: What are your legal responsibilities regarding reporting this abusive behavior (or the abusive behavior toward any employee)? Could you be liable if you don’t report it? What are your rights if he retaliates, or even fires you, for getting involved? What are the risks to the organization, if the wife presses charges against the CEO? I suspect an attorney will tell you there may be more risk if you know about the situation and then say nothing.

If you have an EAP (Employee Assistance Program), you could also ask them for some advice regarding handling this situation. If he is this out of control, I would caution you to follow the advice of the experts, rather than try to attempt an intervention yourself. If his violence erupts, such as a threat towards you, I’d call the police first, and an attorney second.

Zoromski suggests that the HR person should not tolerate the behavior in her presence.  “If it takes getting up and walking out of the room every time he does it, I think that’s the right thing to do.”  At the very least, showing you won’t condone his behavior is a significant statement.

Whether you like the job or not, you probably should start looking for a new job, since this isn’t likely to end well.

Zoromski adds, “It’s hard to believe this is a true story, but then, we hear things like this all the time in the news and from advocacy groups.  The only real difference is that this guy is a CEO…and as far as I know, that doesn’t mean CEOs can’t be jerks too!  In fact, in some companies, it’s a job requirement.”

Joan Lloyd is an executive coach, management consultant, facilitator and professional trainer.  Email your question to Joan at info@joanlloyd.com.  Visit www.JoanLloyd.com to search an archive of more than 1300 of Joan’s articles.  (800) 348-1944 © Joan Lloyd & Associates, Inc.

We take a comprehensive approach to executive coaching. We create a customized plan for each executive, based on the needs of the executive and his/her organization.  Call for more information about our executive coaching process at (800) 348-1944.

Confronting poor performance, or difficult behaviors, is difficult.  Joan Lloyd’s How to Coach & Give Feedback CD is a step-by-step approach to giving feedback to your employees, your coworkers, or even your boss.  Actually reduces defensiveness and encourages open communication. 

Consider the young professional I was talking with recently. He told me he was under intense pressure to “make it” in his field. His work had been noticed by a supplier in his industry and he has been asked to represent their products, and train other users in businesses like his own, in addition to his regular job. This is a coveted position in this industry and he is on the fast track to more notoriety and a bigger career. “I’m under so much stress,” he confided. I feel I have to know everything and I dread not being able to answer a question,” he explained. “I get so nervous, I’m over-preparing and a wreck. I’m afraid of screwing up…so then I screw up.”

I asked, “Do you feel a little like an imposter? Like perhaps they might find out you really don’t know as much as you think you should to be in this position? Because the “imposter complex” is pretty common among high achievers,” I said. “It’s a little like those dreams a lot of people have about not being prepared for a test.” He seemed surprised that I had read his thoughts.

I went on to tell him about how I used to feel like an imposter myself, when I started writing my column 27 years ago (can it possibly be that long?). I kept thinking of all the reasons why I wasn’t qualified—I didn’t know enough, hadn’t been in business long enough, hadn’t been a leader long enough, didn’t have a PhD, and on and on. I kept thinking someone would tap me on the shoulder and say, “What gives you the right to have an advice column?”

As the years passed, I began to relax about it and found my confidence. I began to loosen up and admit when I didn’t know something. I started having more fun when I gave presentations—laughed at myself, engaged the audience more, admitted when I didn’t know something.

I suggested he was probably going through the normal growing pains that come along with high expectations, a strong need to succeed and a drive to become a master.

I saw him recently and he told me he had carefully thought about what I had said. He said the burden of fear of failing began to slough off. He was thrilled with a recent training session he had conducted, where he caught himself doing something during the presentation, and he poked fun at himself. The audience loved it. Then he was asked a question and he turned it around and asked the audience what their experiences had been. They jumped in and later told him “Only a true pro has the confidence to engage the audience that way.” He had discovered that by shedding the need to be perfect, his credibility had actually risen.

What a joy to hear his story. I told him to enjoy the ride, because he had already demonstrated his technical proficiency, or the supplier never would have asked him to represent them to their customers, in the first place. Now it was a matter of focusing on helping his audiences, instead of focusing on himself.

Down the road he will likely come to a place where he will be on the top of his field. Then the problem shifts from worrying about not being good enough, to thinking you are better than you really are. Ironic isn’t it? Then the challenge is to keep an open and eager mind, to keep learning from other people, rather than believing you already know it all.

Ah, life. It’s always a challenge, isn’t it?

Joan Lloyd is an executive coach, management consultant, facilitator and professional trainer.  Email your question to Joan at info@joanlloyd.com.  Visit www.JoanLloyd.com to search an archive of more than 1300 of Joan’s articles.  (800) 348-1944  © Joan Lloyd & Associates, Inc.

We take a comprehensive approach to executive coaching. We create a customized plan for each executive, based on the needs of the executive and his/her organization.  Call for more information about our executive coaching process at (800) 348-1944.

Your career is your responsibility.  Create your own job security by acting more like an entrepreneur at work. Learn how to “sell” your skills to your organization, add more value on the job, develop your internal advocates and identify your personal motivators with Joan Lloyd’s You, Inc. – Success Strategies to Boost Your Career & Help Your Organization. Take charge of your career, today! 

I am in a job hunting dilemma.  I was fired fifteen months ago from my last position, of three years duration, due to differences in management styles.  A few months later, I obtained an independent contractor position.  On my resume, I am listing both jobs and related responsibilities.

On the prospective company’s application form, there was NO question as to if you had been terminated from a previous position.  However, there were questions whether a former employer could be contacted before or after acceptance of a job offer.  I listed no to both questions since my intent was to continue to work for the first employer since there was no conflict of interest. I also felt I owed her, since she had paid for additional training for me to work for her.  I also did not want them to contact my former manager since she would not give me a good reference.

So, I also listed on the application that they could not contact her.  I did, however, list another manager from the company I was fired from, who I had done a project for. She was pleased with my work and said she would give me a good reference.  The only question related to this matter, which came up during the final interview, was the hiring manager asked if I could get along with her.  I answered in the affirmative and said I had never had a problem in the past getting along with the many managers I had worked with in the past 32 years of my work career.  A job offer was made and accepted by me. 

Now the Recruiting Coordinator has raised the following issue - I noticed that you checked the boxes on the Employment Application that you wish for us to not contact your past two employers.  Is there a reason for this?  In order to move forward we need to conduct verification.  My reply to her was -  I need to tell my last employer that I have a new job, since I am still working as an independent contractor for her. I will talk to her tomorrow.  You can contact the second employer to verify dates of employment and salary only.  I have listed a reference from this company that you may contact in the References section.

Was that the best way to handle the situation?  Can the company relinquish their offer of employment based upon their findings?  If so, how do I handle situations similar to this one in the future?  Thanks for your advice.

Answer:

Whenever you tell a potential employer not to contact a former employer, it raises a flag.  They certainly understand that request prior to offering you the job, since they don’t want to create problems between you and your boss, if you aren’t offered the position. But you probably raised concerns by limiting contact after you accepted the job.

What complicates your position is that you said you “never had a problem” getting along with any other manager. They will most certainly call your reference and try to poke around. No doubt, they will ask if she was your manager. When she says she wasn’t, they will probably attempt to contact your former boss.

Your chosen reference, in an effort to be helpful, may even explain that your boss has a difficult management style and the two of you didn’t see eye to eye. That would be fine in a normal situation, but you already told the recruiter you have never had a problem getting along with any boss, so she could wonder about your truthfulness, overall.

If the recruiter feels you have not been honest, it could cost you the offer.

If the recruiter comes back to you, requesting an explanation, tell her the truth (assuming this is what happened): “I never have had a problem with any boss. Even with her, I conducted myself professionally. I had no other problem with anyone else at the company. She had an issue with me, I never did figure out. Everyone acknowledges it wasn’t me.”

In the future, you could use this explanation in an interview, if they want to call this reference. As you put more jobs between you and that experience, it will fade in importance. In the meantime, make sure your current manager is ready to provide a reference which will dilute the negative one. In my opinion, it’s better to tell a carefully worded truth, than try to game it.

Joan Lloyd is an executive coach, management consultant, facilitator and professional trainer.  Email your question to Joan at info@joanlloyd.com.  Visit www.JoanLloyd.com to search an archive of more than 1300 of Joan’s articles.  (800) 348-1944 © Joan Lloyd & Associates, Inc.

Do you need answers to tough job hunting questions?  Are you looking for some added punch to help you stand out from the crowd?  Joan Lloyd’s has developed job hunting tools that can help you to maximize your job search:

Savvy Negotiation Strategies to Get Paid What You’re Worth on a New Job (Detailed, 8-page PDF by email – no shipping charge)
Easy, Step-by-step Guide to Using the Internet to Land a Great Job (10-page PDF by email – no shipping charge)
The Resume That Opens the Door and the Interview That Gets the Job (37-page PDF by email – no shipping charge)

A position recently opened in my office.  I received a call from an old coworker who is applying for the job and asked if she could use me as a reference.  I worked with her many years ago and we have kept casual contact.  When I worked with her I found she was not a team player, brought her personal problems to work, didn't take ownership, etc.  I didn't have the heart to tell her 'no' as we had been friendly acquaintances for many years.  I have no doubt she could do the job, her technical skills are adequate, but I still see these personality traits in her, even though we haven't worked with each other for many years.  I would not be working with her, so it isn't personal.

I discussed this with the hiring manager and gave her my opinion, stressing that this individual is up to the task, but she brings baggage to the table that may not be apparent in an interview. 

I have since talked to this acquaintance and find she has been out of a job for over a year and is about to lose her unemployment.  I feel terrible that I interfered and now think I should have just let things ride out.  If the hiring manager were to ask my opinion, I could have said something at that point.  However, I have given permission to use my name as a personal reference many times in the past and rarely have I been called to verify, so there is a good chance I would not have been given the opportunity to offer information. 

What is the best thing to do in a case like this?  In this economy, I wouldn't want to be shut out of an opportunity.  Did I handle this correctly or is guilt clouding the situation?  

Answer:

Guilt is wasted energy. Look back on the situation and ask yourself a few questions. Then consider if you would answer them the way I did.

I am Wiccan, and have had issues on the job, and now that I am job hunting, have issues in being hired.  I usually wear my pentacle the same as many Christians wear a cross.  I have been told by many that I should not wear a pentacle to job interviews; if I do wear one, to have it on a long chain and tuck it in for the interview.  I also have a Myspace and a Facebook page, and my religion of choice is expressed on both. 

I also have my own business as a minister, and a psychic/medium, which is also advertised on my Facebook and Myspace pages.  My income from these is not much, so I am job hunting. 

I feel that I should be able to be as proud of my beliefs as anyone else.  I am a stable, good employee and work hard at any job I am given.  I know that, legally, I cannot be discriminated against because of my religion, but with the economy the way it is, a potential employer can use any one of a number of reasons to not hire me. 

I have been advised to put my Myspace and Facebook pages as private, so they can only be viewed by friends, but that would defeat the purpose of the pages, since they are my advertising. 

I usually wear a business suit, or at least dress slacks, a nice blouse or sweater, and a jacket for interviews.  When I get to the interview I see everyone else in casual attire and I wonder if my dressing up for the interview is hurting my chances for hire.  Any advice you can offer would be appreciated.

Answer:

Your image is important when job hunting—whether it is how you dress, or how you present yourself Online. I agree with the advice you’ve been given. Since your advertising hasn’t generated enough customers to provide an income, and it can create the wrong impression to employers (fair or not), I suggest you keep your religious preference private.

Dear Joan:

I work as a sales representative for a small, family-run business.  The family is of a religious sect, which requires all the women to wear skirts.  Although I agreed when I was hired, I wonder if this is considered illegal in this day and age.

The double standard question arises when all the family members need to attend church, or family functions. They go whenever they wish (and of course) this is their business, so they have the right, I guess? The rest of us, who are not members of their religious sector, cannot take holidays unless they give permission, even if we have our vacation days banked. Is this legal?

If this is legal, then I would have to call this an unbalance of respect. Whereas we have to respect their church and gathering dates, but they have no respect of our preference of vacation dates.

If one was to take the vacation dates anyway, regardless of whether the employer has given permission or not, regardless of the reasons why the employee has chosen the dates, are of no consequence of why permission was not given, does the employer have the right to fire the employee?

Isn't the above illustration a case of discrimination based on religion? And in this case the employers are religious, but the employees are not.

I suppose you can say, “Why work there?” You are right. I am ready to quit. I will quit the day before I wanted my time off and was refused.

Another question is that, because I am paid on commission, and the commission will be calculated up to, and including, the last day of the month. If I quit, will the company by law have to pay me the commission owed to me? It is usually paid two weeks after the last day of the month. This means I would have quit two weeks before the check is issued. I don't want to have to fight for my commission check. Will the company have to pay the commissions owed to me?

I don't know if this type of work environment is up to legal standards, especially in a small company, where there isn't a human resources manager to oversee the rights of the employees. I feel helpless.

Answer:

You would be wise to consult an employment attorney in your state, but here is my non-legal opinion. Since wearing a skirt was a condition of employment (that you agreed to) they can enforce that rule. 

In general, owners typically set their policies so that employees can use their vacation when they want. However, owners have the right to deny a vacation request that comes at a bad time for the business. For instance, if too many people want off at one time, or someone wants off during a busy period. If you are denied a vacation day, but take it anyway, they would probably call it “insubordination” and fire you. However, If they are limiting vacation time for some but not others, this is getting into sticky legal territory.

I asked Eugene K. Hollander, an employment attorney from Chicago, what he thinks.  “Employers can require employees to use their vacation days for religious holidays.  It may be religious discrimination, however, if the employer affords certain employees of one religion time off and does not require them to use their vacation time, while requiring those of other religions to either use their vacation time, or outright refusing them time off.” 

Your commission was earned while you were employed, so they would be required to pay it. Hollander agrees, “If the employee has earned the commissions, those sums, like salary or unused vacation time should be paid to the employee.  Illinois, for instance, has the Wage Payment and Collection Act, which requires that all such sums be paid to employees within three days of their last day.”

In spite of these legal boundaries, I wouldn’t be surprised if they refused. They seem to be oblivious to how their behavior negatively affects their employees and their business.

Joan Lloyd is an executive coach, management consultant, facilitator and professional trainer.  Email your question to Joan at info@joanlloyd.com.  Visit www.JoanLloyd.com to search an archive of more than 1300 of Joan’s articles.  (800) 348-1944  © Joan Lloyd & Associates, Inc.

Would you like to bridge the commitment gap with your employees?   We provide management consulting, executive coaching and customized, skills-based training for managers and supervisors, that changes behavior, creates a healthy culture and builds a customer-focused team.  Call us today at (800) 348-1944.

Do you need answers to tough job hunting questions?  Are you looking for some added punch to help you stand out from the crowd?  Joan Lloyd’s has developed job hunting tools that can help you to maximize your job search:

Savvy Negotiation Strategies to Get Paid What You’re Worth on a New Job (Detailed, 8-page PDF by email – no shipping charge)
Easy, Step-by-step Guide to Using the Internet to Land a Great Job (10-page PDF by email – no shipping charge)
The Resume That Opens the Door and the Interview That Gets the Job (37-page PDF by email – no shipping charge)

I live in one state and I am applying for a job in another state. I have limited funds and I know that I will have to most likely pay for my own move.

However my real question is. Is it appropriate to ask about the salary? And how do I ask before either flying, or driving, the 15 hours for the interview?  I don’t want to waste either one’s time.

Answer:

The employer has as much interest in your question as you do. They don’t want to waste time either. So, I agree you should discuss it upfront.

Negotiating salary is a little tricky at this stage, since you don’t really know the requirements of the job. Typically, I’d advise you to stall until you have a clear picture of what the job is worth. Here are some tips that may help you.

To get the interview in the first place, you must first get past the employer’s reluctance to consider an application from another state. If the position is specialized, or difficult to fill, they may cast a nation-wide net, but if there are a large number of local applicants, they may not even consider you. They will go after the applicants who won’t require a move, or travel costs for an interview.

Include language in your cover letters that removes some of those objections. For instance, “I am planning to move to Minnesota in the next few months…” You are not explaining how, when or why—simply that if this works out, you would indeed be moving. If they are willing to pay moving expenses, all the better. But if not, the salary may be enough to cover your move.

If you are called by an employer, they will probably do a phone interview. During that call, they will probably ask you, “What salary are you looking for?” Do some homework, so you aren’t caught off guard. Research your field, talk to people who hold the job you want, and check out websites such as Salary.com, to find out what jobs are worth in those states. If they don’t ask, wait until they suggest an in-person interview. Then say, “I don’t normally like to discuss compensation before I learn about the job, but before you and I take the next step, could I get a ballpark idea of what the position pays, to make sure we aren’t wasting each other’s time?”

Avoid telling an employer what you are making now. Instead, tell him or her what you are looking for on your next job. This isn’t as much of an issue if the job to which you are applying is the next, logical step in your field, and in the same industry. However, if you are coming from a nonprofit or making a career transition, your current salary may be significantly below the salary you desire. Also, avoid limiting your negotiating power by saying something like, “I’m looking for a job that pays between $50,000 and $60,000.” Why cap it? What if they were going to offer $80,000?

Another way to get a job offer is to visit the area and line up a lot of informational interviews by phone, before you plan to arrive. Pick a date several months in the future, and then start calling companies to tell them you plan on moving there, and will be in the area on particular dates. Ask if they will meet with you to share any advice they may have about living and working there. Most people are eager to meet with “new blood,” not only to showcase their city, but to see if they have talent the company wants. This free trial offer is hard to refuse and removes all the obstacles.

If your informational interviews are successful, ask, “Is there anyone else you can introduce me to, who can give me advice?” This technique usually starts opening doors, even after you go back home. Maintain contact with the people you met and continue to ask for introductions by phone and online. Don’t wear out your welcome with a few—rather, ask that question of everyone you meet. The job-hunting drill is still a matter of networking--who you know, and who knows you.

Joan Lloyd is an executive coach, management consultant, facilitator and professional trainer.  Email your question to Joan at info@joanlloyd.com.  Visit www.JoanLloyd.com to search an archive of more than 1300 of Joan’s articles.  (800) 348-1944  or (414) 354-9500 © Joan Lloyd & Associates, Inc.

Do you need answers to tough job hunting questions?  Are you looking for some added punch to help you stand out from the crowd?  Joan Lloyd’s has developed job hunting tools that can help you to maximize your job search:

Savvy Negotiation Strategies to Get Paid What You’re Worth on a New Job (Detailed, 8-page PDF by email – no shipping charge)
Easy, Step-by-step Guide to Using the Internet to Land a Great Job (10-page PDF by email – no shipping charge)
The Resume That Opens the Door and the Interview That Gets the Job (37-page PDF by email – no shipping charge)

Thank you for your advice regarding interview etiquette. I thought I would share a brief experience I had recently. I went to two interviews at a great equity firm. No decision has been made yet, but I did get feedback from one of my recruitment consultants. She said that their only concern was that I was perhaps "too enthusiastic” and they think I wouldn't blend in as well.

I wasn't overly enthusiastic, but I had to show them that I was ready for the challenge and that I was the best candidate for the position. I have never been told that before. Now they are in the process of interviewing someone else as a comparison to myself. So, if this individual shows no sign of enthusiasm and willingness for the position, will they have the chance? This is tough to take but a learning experience nevertheless. I live in London, where everyone wants the same job. It’s a jungle out there. What separates the right candidates (I thought) was enthusiasm to succeed. Any advice?

Answer:

If “enthusiasm” is defined as showing an eagerness and willingness to do the job, I side with you-- don’t change a thing. Perhaps this environment is extremely conservative and they fear an outgoing personality would upset the buttoned down atmosphere. Sounds boring to me. I say move on and don’t overthink it. Take your enthusiasm to a place that values it!

Do you need answers to tough job hunting questions?  Are you looking for some added punch to help you stand out from the crowd?  Joan Lloyd’s has developed job hunting tools that can help you to maximize your job search:

Savvy Negotiation Strategies to Get Paid What You’re Worth on a New Job (Detailed, 8-page PDF by email – no shipping charge)
Easy, Step-by-step Guide to Using the Internet to Land a Great Job (10-page PDF by email – no shipping charge)
The Resume That Opens the Door and the Interview That Gets the Job (37-page PDF by email – no shipping charge)  

I am currently employed by a small company, in which I wear many hats. The list of my job duties includes Retail Sales Manager, Employment Recruiter, Media Spokesperson, and Website Content Writer. I am planning to terminate my employment within the next few weeks because my husband has had to relocate for work purposes and I plan to move with him to another state. I do not have a job lined up in the new location yet. My work is very seasonal and I do not expect to have many opportunities from which to choose until next spring.
 
I am considering whether or not to negotiate the opportunity to continue to continue writing content for my current employer’s website. I could certainly do that type of work from any location. I am an excellent writer and intend to continue with that type of work, even if no one pays me for it.
 
Here is my question:  How do I name my price? This type of job might be considered free lance, salary or hourly.

I am in a bit of a tough situation. I’ve been working in this mid-size company in a mid-level position since little over a year. Due to a lot of company wide-politics and new initiatives, my team has been marginalized and I’ve heard from many sources that if the company were to have layoffs (which are most probably going to happen soon) my team would definitely be on that list. My work-friends have suggested to me to start looking outside, and within the company too.

I’ve started with looking into openings within the company. Here is the tougher part – there is an opening which suits my skills and interests and it’s in a team which is very important to the company, therefore the job will most probably be safe from the layoffs. However, I came to know, from a very good friend, that the hiring manager has a terrible personality and is a strong micro-manager. There are a couple of people who have quit their jobs because of this very reason. I also came to know that she is rude, has very high expectations and loves to control. On the other hand, she is influential and gets things done, therefore her bosses love her.

I like the position and the challenges that will come along. I know that I’ll attain new, great skills which will add a lot of value to my resume, but I’m afraid that my new manager's personality might become a big obstacle in my success. My current situation isn’t any good either, but the people I work with now are very laid back. My current manager says that he doesn’t want stress in his life, and therefore, he is okay with our marginalized situation, which I don’t agree with. I also don’t have enough work here and that’s de-motivating me, big time, making me more worried about my job security, and also not having that respect in the company.

What should I do? Take a chance and try to make my job situation better, or stick around doing nothing in my current team, and hope that things will get better? I’m looking for opportunities outside the company too, but in this job market, that will sure take time.

Answer:

You have two polar opposites as options—neither one is very desirable. You already know that the job you have is not a good fit. The manager is not going to grow you, and his “Don’t worry, be happy” attitude is putting the department at risk. So you are wise to get out.

The internal job opening has “run for your life” all over it. However, I wouldn’t take the rumor as gospel. I think you owe it to yourself to find out more before dismissing it as a bad choice. Some options include speaking to the hiring manager and inquiring about the position in an informational interview. You can say you are interested in applying but you want to know more about the job first.

During that meeting, ask a lot of questions about the results she expects, her management style, problems she hopes the new person can fix, pet peeves, and so on. Ask her if she minds it if you speak informally to some members of her team, to learn more about the job. Her reaction to your questions will be revealing.

Keep in mind that “micromanagers” come in many forms. For example, some people label their boss a micromanager, because he or she is expecting them to change, or improve their performance—and they are resisting.

On the other hand, micromanagers are often perfectionists who cannot be pleased. Sometimes they think they are the only one with the right answer—and their control suffocates their direct reports. So in spite of a glowing job description on paper, the life is snuffed out of what could have been a great growth position.

The job may be worth taking however, especially if you can get exposure to an area that will make you more marketable in the long run. If you can last a few years, you could enhance your resume for future positions inside or outside the company. But I would only take the job if you feel you can develop enough rapport with the leader, and meet her exacting standards. Micromanagers only back off if they feel they can trust the employee—and “trust” means that the person has the same high standards the leader does.

If you discover the new area isn’t going to be a good fit for you, step up your efforts to find something outside the business. It’s better to leave with a lazy boss’ recommendation, than a micromanager’s negative reference.

Joan Lloyd is an executive coach, management consultant, facilitator and professional trainer.  Email your question to Joan at info@joanlloyd.com.  Visit www.JoanLloyd.com to search an archive of more than 1300 of Joan’s articles.  (800) 348-1944  © Joan Lloyd & Associates, Inc.

Do you need answers to tough job hunting questions?  Are you looking for some added punch to help you stand out from the crowd?  Joan Lloyd’s has developed job hunting tools that can help you to maximize your job search:

Savvy Negotiation Strategies to Get Paid What You’re Worth on a New Job (Detailed, 8-page PDF by email – no shipping charge)
Easy, Step-by-step Guide to Using the Internet to Land a Great Job (10-page PDF by email – no shipping charge)
The Resume That Opens the Door and the Interview That Gets the Job (37-page PDF by email – no shipping charge)

Your career is your responsibility.  Create your own job security by acting more like an entrepreneur at work. Learn how to “sell” your skills to your organization, add more value on the job, develop your internal advocates and identify your personal motivators with Joan Lloyd’s You, Inc. – Success Strategies to Boost Your Career & Help Your Organization. Take charge of your career, today! 

I am really hesitant to get a job offer because of some doubts I experienced during my interview.

A night before he called me and asked if in case I will be hired for work, would I rather stay with my cousin, or find a place nearer to the office. I said I am comfortable with my cousin.

The next day is my interview. I was applying for secretarial position. He asked me to take off my blazer and to stand, and he stared at me. I asked him I can seat, he said ok.

In my observation, he is staring at me most of the time without saying anything for long. So I say to cut the dead air and ask him what's next or what else.

Is it normal to apply in this position to be asked to take off the blazer and stand? And is it normal to be stared at most of the time?

Also he asked me the question he asked a night before. If I think it’s better to live separate from my cousin and move nearer to the office. In my observation, he wanted me to move separate from my cousin.  I chose to move nearer to the office and he said “Very good girl.”

I don't see it as big deal because my cousin's place is not too far. Besides it should be my problem to manage my time right? So long as I can do my job well.

He asked me to do the paperwork. I did, it was not perfect. Yet, he is still interested to hire me. He just asked me to convince him more. I don't know how. He does not ask for anything else to do.

He said he does not see that I am interested in the position. I told him, I am (but deep inside I am hesitant). Another one, he said he does not want his secretary to have boyfriend.

Also when he wants me to look at the document he is holding, he is really too close that I can smell his breath. Is it normal? I mean, he can let me see the document too, but with a little distance right?

The next day he called me and asked when can I start if he will hire me. I honestly said I am hesitant, and feel uncomfortable in the office and I would like to ensure my safety. I asked for another day to think about it, and he allowed me.

What do you think? I badly need your advice. I am in Jumeirah, United Arab Emirates.  The manager is a US citizen. He let me see his passport that he is a US citizen. Thank you so much!

Answer:

He is interviewing for a mistress, not an employee. He is dangerous. Run for your life.

You need to listen to your “little voice” inside because it is saying something is not right. Do not accept a job offer from this person. In fact, you may even want to send a copy of this column to this person’s employer.

All the behaviors you mentioned are dangerous. He was probably testing you to see how compliant you would be. He asked you to stand, so he could look at your chest—and you did-- which was a test to see if you would do whatever he wanted, even if it was sexual. He stood too close to you and violated your natural space, which was another way to test your willingness to let him cross your normal boundaries.

The most obvious signal is telling you he doesn’t want his secretary to have a boyfriend. That is because he wants you all to himself and a boyfriend will not be happy if he hears your boss is making sexual demands. In addition, his request to have you live apart from your cousin is another attempt to keep you cut off from your family. You will be easier to control if no one is questioning where you are. And if he is married, he will want to come and spend time in your apartment. You will be easier to trap.

Finally, when he asked you to “convince him” about wanting the job, it was his way to test how desperate you are. He wants you to be desperate, so that you will be more likely to give in to his sexual and work demands. He wants your back up against a wall, so you won’t report him and you will do whatever he wants to keep your job. He wants full control.

In America there are laws about this kind of behavior. He has asked illegal interview questions and has crossed the legal line when he asked you to stand up with your blazer off, told you not to have a boyfriend, and not to live with your cousin. There is no job-related reason for those requests. He is praying on your naiveté and counting on the differences in culture to be his smoke screen.

Joan Lloyd is an executive coach, management consultant, facilitator and professional trainer.  Email your question to Joan at info@joanlloyd.com.  Visit www.JoanLloyd.com to search an archive of more than 1300 of Joan’s articles.  (800) 348-1944  © Joan Lloyd & Associates, Inc.

Do you need answers to tough job hunting questions?  Are you looking for some added punch to help you stand out from the crowd?  Joan Lloyd’s has developed job hunting tools that can help you to maximize your job search:

Savvy Negotiation Strategies to Get Paid What You’re Worth on a New Job (Detailed, 8-page PDF by email – no shipping charge)
Easy, Step-by-step Guide to Using the Internet to Land a Great Job (10-page PDF by email – no shipping charge)
The Resume That Opens the Door and the Interview That Gets the Job (37-page PDF by email – no shipping charge)

I thought I would ask your advice about this situation (which may or may not materialize).  I'm an IT professional, who has (unsuccessfully) been interviewing for the past one and one half years for a new position (I was outsourced two years ago in the Dallas area, and since have relocated to Wisconsin)

Now, I think I am very near to the point of that offer I've been waiting for, but, after interviewing, I am a little bit intimidated (at least based on what I've heard) with the company that may soon make me an offer.  (The recruiter indicated I would be a great fit for the company and is arranging an interview for next week). I am one of only two candidates he is presenting for the position.

The problem is, I consider myself easy to get along with, yet tough when I need to be.  It's my understanding that this is a small IT shop (less than 10 people) with varying "personalities," shall we say, and that I would be replacing a Project Coordinator, who is going to be let go, due to not enough technical skills.

So essentially, I would be joining a group of strong "personalities," to assist on keeping projects (that have since derailed and gotten behind) on track and take some of the burden off the CIO. What is my best approach in joining a small group that is already at odds with each other and threatening to bail if they replace this current Project Coordinator?  Also, there is at least one Senior IT person (18 years) that they say, no matter how difficult (abrasive) he is to work with; he will most likely never be replaced.

Am I naive to think that I may be able to reign in these personalities and keep projects on track, or what would be my best approach to starting in this position?  I get the feeling that any bold/sudden approaches upon joining the group is just going to send the group into more of an attitude spin, yet maintaining the status quo will not get the projects on task...

Should I forgo this opportunity and hope (though prospects are looking dim) for a less stressful opportunity? Thank you for your advice and insight!

Answer:

If you are looking for a perfect team, where everyone gets along and all you have to do is be the technical Yoda, you are in for a very long job search. The only difference between this job, and most other jobs in leadership, is that you happen to know about the issues beforehand.

If you don’t have the stomach for dealing with people issues, you need to reconsider your career path. It sounds as if you have the technical skills to get the job done, but do you have the ability to get results through others? Without managerial courage, you could fall victim to the strong personalities. What’s needed is a strong leader, who can chart a vision, set clear expectations, and hold them accountable. You no doubt have the skills to figure out the technical solutions, but without a team who can execute, you will be unable to deliver on your customer promises.

If the team is threatening to “bail” because they don’t want their non-technical leader to be replaced, it begs the questions: “What was preventing them from staying on track with their projects?” “Do they like their current leader because he or she didn’t know enough about their work to hold them accountable?” “If they are at odds with one another, is it because some are results-oriented and others aren’t?” If some of them left out of protest, you get the opportunity to replace them with people you choose.

Before you take the job, negotiate for clear authority to hire and fire members of the team. Ask direct questions about the source of the team’s issues. Ask about the 18-year employee. Is he untouchable? Ask how much support the CIO is going to give you and if senior management above him will also support you, so you can get the department back on track. If it looks like your hands will be tied, don’t take the job.

But if they are really ready to get this team back on track, I suggest the following steps: